Rabbi Gets a Bonus

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          At the regular Saturday morning service, the rabbi
 announced that he was planning to leave for a larger congregation,
 that would pay him more. There is a hush within the congregation. No
 one wants him to leave, because he is so popular.

 Fred Shapiro, who owns several car dealerships in Newton and
 Brookline, stands up and proclaims "If the rabbi stays, I will provide
 him with a new Cadillac every year, and his wife with a Honda
 mini-van, to transport their children!"
 The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds.

 Saul Cohen, a successful businessman and lawyer, stands and says, "If
 the rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary, and
 establish a foundation to guarantee a free college education for
 his children!"
 More sighs and loud applause.

 Estelle Rubin, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, "If the
 rabbi stays, I will give him sex!"
 
 There is total silence.
 The rabbi, blushing, asks her: "Mrs. Rubin, you're a wonderful and
 holy lady. Whatever possessed you to say that?"
 Estelle's 90-year-old husband, Abe, is now trying to hide, holding his
 forehead with the palm of his hand, and shaking his head from side to
 side, while his wife replied "Well, I just asked my husband how we
 could help, and he said, "F**k him."